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(Source: like-the-birds-at-night)

I love you Katy! :)

YES - my dream was like a teleserye. WHY? it’s because, Ilang beses na ako gumising feeling thankful that my sad dream ended hanging, but then when I go back to sleep, may CONTINUATION. Sabe ng panaginip ko na un??! hahha :> It was really sad to the extent that I wake up ALREADY crying. It’s like, i started crying while asleep and then when I open my eyes, I realize that I’ve been already crying for a couple of minutes or hours perhaps. 

The sad dream of mine was about my relationship with my most treasured boyfriend :”> We are the type of couple that don’t always fight, we always make it up to one another. So the dream goes like this…

We were very happy, as always, and then one day a girl came up to me and told me that my boyF and her are gonna get married soon. The girl was very familiar to me and I never imagined that, such thing might happen. I was very very very shocked and puzzled by that. As a trusting girlfriend, I told myself that I had to know from him personally the truth. The girl and I continued talking telling me the same thing over and over again. When I looked towards a different direction… I saw my boyfriend there with this weird facial expression. I cannot figure out if he is nervous, mad or something… but that expression of his made me nervous.. “uh-oh, i think what this girl is telling me makes sense..” I got nervous, VERY nervous. The next scene was I think, I confronted Him and asked him what was that all about. I cannot remember the exact details but I remember that there was a background song being sang by this OTHER GIRL.. The man who can’t be moved, exactly. So we talked, and he told me that YES he and the girl will be married. He told me also how I am not good enough. </3

After that I woke up. I am very very very thankful to know that It was all just a DREAM. All those time i thought that it is really happening. Thank God, it isn’t. I checked my phone, its 5 in the morning, I saw his text, said “HI :)” but i got that message at around 12 in the morning, so he is prolly asleep at that time. I replied to him, “Napanaginipan kita, tau pa daw pero may papakasalan ka na iba :”( “

Feeling relieved and thankful that it was all just a dream, I went back to sleep. And them boom, i dreamt again about the same thing but it is a continuation of the earlier. Damn it I was super sad about it. It felt like the emotions are so true.

In my dream, i went up to my mom and told her about it. My mom doesn’t know much about my love life, and for the first time i’m telling her something about it, the break up particularly. I cried and cried to her a lot. After that, my boyfriend approached me and told me that he heard what i told my mom. He told me that he heard me say that I always talk to him, do things for him etc etc. and he told me that those weren’t true. That i don’t actually do anything for him, that i dont talk to him and tell him stories whatsoever. I was reminded by the feeling that I am always the one that COMPLAINS, DEMANDS, and something like that. I always tell him in real life how he is not doing things for me, how he lack initiative,… in that very moment in my dream I realized that i am not the only one who asks for something, that he also want things that I fail to comply but he never ever complained nor demanded. I remember him saying in my dream that it is too late and we can never get back together. SAD was i :(

After that, I woke up again. Thank God!!! And I was crying already when I woke up. It seemed so true. Checked the time, it is  around 8:30. I was feeling a bit more sleepy so I went back to sleep again.

BONGGA ng panaginip ko, may continuation na naman. But the dream was all about me and my insights about the dream na.

In that part of my dream, I came to realize that I am already single after almost 3 years. In just a click I lost my treasured best friend and boyfriend. And my facebook relationship status is already single, while his.. Married. I cried and am waiting that he will come back to me and make amends. I will be very happy to accept him back, but for the time being, I’ve decided to wait for him. Then a song played on the BG its Unwell by matchbox 20. Saying..

I’m not crazy I’m just a li’l unwell I know right now you can’t tell but stay awhile and maybe then You’ll see.. a different side of me.. soon enough you gonna think of me, like how I used to be. - Matchbox 20

Lesson from this is, to appreciate the things that my partner does for me. It is not always that my demands be satisfied, I should also give him his due. Because he may not be complaining and asking for something, I now know that there are things that could do to make him even more happier. I love my boyfriend and i will appreciate him always. A guy like him is the greatest gift that a girl like me could ever have. 

I love you babe, i will treasure you always. Advance happy 3rd year :”>

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Matchbox 20 - Unwell from contele D on Vimeo.